The Addictive Power of an Affair
An affair is a very powerful addiction. The craving to be with the lover can be so intense that objective reality doesn't have much of a chance. The fact that a spouse and children may be permanently injured by this cruel indulgence doesn't seem to matter. All that matters is spending more time with the lover. That makes it an addiction.
Even the one-night stand may be an addiction. It may not be an addiction to a particular lover, but it may still be an addiction—to one-night stands. In affairs that have low emotional attachment, the addiction is often to the act of having sex itself, rather than to a particular lover.
What drives a woman to cheat may look a lot different than what drives a man to cheat however; it’s really not very different. Most extramarital affairs happen because of unmet needs in the relationship.
When your girlfriend or wife is unhappy in your relationship, you’d better watch out because women tend to have affairs when they feel disconnected from the marital relationship.
If you would just take a moment to look and listen, there are warning signs that are staring you right in the face. Below are the five most common signs that your wife or girlfriend might be having an affair, or at least is in danger of having one.
Signs Your Wife of Girlfriend May Be Having an Affair.
She doesn’t mind you spending a lot of your free time with you friends, watching TV, or playing on the computer (or any other thing that you do a lot of).
There are some women who don’t mind this to start with but this becomes a problem when at some point in the past your wife did mind these things. The fact that she no longer has a problem with them could mean that she feels you are not invested in the relationship.
She doesn’t ask you to go out with her the way she used to.
She has most likely given up hope of you actually wanting to do something that she wants to do. This is a dangerous place for her to be. Should she find a male “friend” that shares her interests she will be susceptible to an affair. If this sounds like your wife you can take measures to repair the damage to you marriage.
She doesn’t talk to you like she used to and/or she has a male friend who listens to her.
You better believe that if she isn’t talking to you, she is talking to someone. Women tend to need that emotional connection that sharing brings and they will generally develop an emotional attachment before sexual activities ensue. If your wife has stopped telling you the details of her day or sharing her feelings with you, you need to do something fast. This is a breading ground for an affair to develop in.
She has started working a lot of overtime, coming home late or leaving earlier in the morning.
This is pretty self explanatory. If you notice other signs and this one is also present you will need to figure out whether she is actually working or not.
She has started to avoid sex with you.
Most women need an emotional connection in order to feel desire. If she feels she does not have that connection with you she will start to pull away sexually. As she develops an emotional connection with another male what is left of her emotional connection to you will start to wane further.
There are ups and downs in every marriage. Try to remember that one of these signs by itself does not signify that an affair is taking place. If you only see a couple of signs you should count yourself lucky and work to improve that area of your marriage. However; when you see multiple signs then you need to heed their warning. If an affair is not taking place it soon will be. Take the steps necessary to protect your most important asset, your marriage.